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Mothers and computers
This is again from the HAND list..
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>Subject: Your 'Have A Nice Day' Laugh #0270
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>Your 'Have A Nice Day' Laugh is:
>
> Sent in by Tim J Coleman:
>
> Mother and Understanding Computers
>
> For years I badgered my mother with questions about whether Santa Claus
> is a real person or not. Her answer was always "Well, you asked for the
> presents and they came, didn't they?" I finally understood the full
> meaning of her reply when I heard the definition of a virtual device:
> "A software or hardware entity which responds to commands in a manner
> indistinguishable from the real device." Mother was telling me that
> Santa Claus is a virtual person (simulated by loving parents) who
> responds to requests from children in a manner indistinguishable from
> the real saint.
>
> Mother also taught the IF ... THEN ... ELSE structure: "If it's snowing,
> then put your boots on before you go to school; otherwise just wear your
> shoes."
>
> Mother explained the difference between batch and transaction
> processing:
>
> "We'll wash the white clothes when we get enough of them to make a load,
> but we'll wash these socks out right now by hand because you'll need
> them this afternoon."
>
> Mother taught me about linked lists. Once, for a birthday party, she
> laid out a treasure hunt of ten hidden clues, with each clue telling
> where to find the next one, and the last one leading to the treasure.
> She then gave us the first clue.
>
> Mother understood about parity errors. When she counted socks after
> doing the laundry, she expected to find an even number and groaned when
> only one sock of a pair emerged from the washing machine. Later she
> applied the principles of redundancy engineering to this problem by
> buying our socks three identical pairs at a time. This greatly increased
> the odds of being able to come up with at least one matching pair.
>
> Mother had all of us children writes then mailed in a single envelope
> with a single stamp. This was obviously an instance of blocking records in
> order to save money by reducing the number of physical I/O operations.
>
> Mother used flags to help her manage the housework. Whenever she turned
> on the stove, she put a potholder on top of her purse to reminder
> herself to turn it off again before leaving the house.
>
> Mother knew about devices which raise an interrupt signal to be
> serviced when they have completed any operation. She had a whistling
> teakettle.
>
> Mother understood about LIFO ordering. In my lunch bag she put the
> dessert on the bottom, the sandwich in the middle, and the napkin on top
> so that things would come out in the right order at lunchtime.
>
> There is an old story that God knew He couldn't be physically present
> everywhere at once, to show His love for His people, and so He created
> mothers. That is the difference between centralized and distributed
> processing. As any kid who's ever misbehaved at a neighbor's house finds
> out, all the mothers in the neighborhood talk to each other. That's a
> local area network of distributed processors that can't be beat.
>
> Mom, you were the best computer teacher I ever had.
>
>
>
>
>
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-=TED=- O- JAPH [email protected]