JAVA VERSUS NEW CRACK PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE

• To: [email protected]
• Subject: JAVA VERSUS NEW CRACK PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE
• From: Joe Block <[email protected]>
• Date: Fri, 20 Sep 1996 01:47:39 -0400
• ReSent-Date: Fri, 20 Sep 1996 13:26:40 -0400 (EDT)
• ReSent-From: Geeks-l moderator <[email protected]>
• ReSent-Message-ID: <[email protected]>
• ReSent-To: [email protected]

Got this from another list - Geek content high, so I thought I'd pass it on.

JAVA VERSUS NEW CRACK PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE

In an idle moment, I have seen the future:

Clients "wired" on Java?  Now get them Hooked with new CRACK!  Our marketing
plan ensures that clients will beat a path to your door.

Gun Microsystems proudly presents:  CRACK!

The compelling new platform-independent programming language that's hitting
the streets everywhere!!!

Features/Products include:

Neighborhood (tm) Server
FREEBASE-D (tm), our flavor of Unix
CrackCode (tm)
ADDICT! (tm) (24 hour a day tech support -- if you can afford it)
CRACK-House (tm) development environment
New CRACK objects, AKA "Rocks" (tm)
Smuggler (tm) -- Converts C++ and Perl into CrackCode
Tech-9 compliant
The Pipe (tm) Compiler
Blue Lips (tm) debugger -- never leaves your skin crawling
CRACK network operating system, Peer-to-Peer Pressure (tm).

Current advertising slogan:  "Smokin'!"

Pah... just got sick of all the cutesie coffee tie-ins with Java.  Though
y'all might enjoy this.

Joseph Block <[email protected]>

Q: Does God control everything that happens in my life?
A: He could, if he used the debugger, but it's tedious to step through
   all those variables.
PGP 2048bit-Fingerprint: F8 A2 A5 15 56 42 9B 16  3F BD 57 0F 8A ED E3 21

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